All tagged overcoming perfectionism

Why You Haven't Tried that Fun New Movement

Why You Haven't Tried that Fun New Movement

Stephanie Ondrusek
body image, mindset

I spent a long time wrapped in the coiling tendrils of perfectionism, that Devil's Snare tightening its grip the harder I tried to escape it.

I've forced myself into countless situations (friendships, relationships, jobs, even a college major!) that weren't really for me, or even things I wanted. My intuition was screaming at me to get out--you know the feeling when, deep in your gut, you feel clenching, writhing, twisting, and a bit of nausea? I was a pro at ignoring it. Through lots of trial and error, I've learned to let go... slowly but surely.

One of the places this has been most prevalent in my life has been in my fitness endeavors (and, I suspect, many of yours, because I've had some version of this conversation with almost every client I've ever trained longer than a few weeks).

Fighting with Your Scale? 7 Better Ways to Measure Progress

Fighting with Your Scale? 7 Better Ways to Measure Progress

Stephanie Ondrusek
body image, coaching, FAQs + hacks, mindset

Monday morning did roll around, carrying an unwieldy dose of guilt and shame every time.

I’d wake up, feel badly for not, “sticking to the plan,” wondering why I couldn’t just have one, “cheat meal,” why I had to do this every time, why anyone ever saw anything in me other than a fraud, and I’d step on the scale.

I lived and died by that number.

If it wasn’t too far off my Friday weight, then I somehow, “got away with,’ eating foods that didn’t work for me, because my feelings didn’t matter if they weren’t reflected on the scale.

If I WAS far off my Friday weight (which I often was), I was a failure, and the only solution was to buckle down even harder the next week, promising myself that this week, a “cheat meal,” would be just one meal.

Been there? How’s it working for you?

On perfectionism and why it's bullshit.

On perfectionism and why it's bullshit.

Stephanie Ondrusek
FAQs + hacks, general BAMFery, mindset

Perfectionism is a shield. It’s a defense move: the belief that if we do things perfectly and look physically perfect while doing it, we will avoid judgment, shame, and/or blame. It’s not about our internal motivation at all. Perfectionism is ALL about other people and trying to earn their approval; it’s correlated with depression, anxiety, and addiction; and, perhaps most frustratingly, it impedes our achievement, because it throws the fear of failure/meeting *OTHER PEOPLE’S* expectations (rather than our own) in our faces, thereby keeping us out of the arena of really trying.