All tagged overculture

How Do You Define Yourself?

How Do You Define Yourself?

Stephanie Ondrusek
body image, feminism

We’re told, at every turn, how we must define ourselves.

We all know the narrative of the overculture: womxn are supposed to be small, demure, delicate. We're constantly in pursuit of shrinking and forever deferring to someone – anyone – with more authority.

Many of us hold this societal ideal in the lofty turrets of our minds for a lifetime: we remain locked away like Rapunzel, hoping someone will climb the tower and ask us if that ideal is, in fact, who we are or what we want. In the meantime, we accept it and work tirelessly to fit into that mold.

Has it ever occurred to you that you can ask yourself?

Step Off the Diet Rollercoaster.

Step Off the Diet Rollercoaster.

Stephanie Ondrusek
coaching, feminism

The moment we let advertising & its victims tell us what’s best for us is the watershed moment for many; what follows is a trickling stream – and eventual downpour – of shame. We're told that certain foods are bad, or that lifting heavy makes us bulky & that we shouldn’t want to “look like a man."

Hear me clearly: NO ONE knows what’s right for you better than you do.

To the Damsel in Distress

To the Damsel in Distress

Stephanie Ondrusek
feminism, mindset

These stories spin any number of ways, but – most often – we’re the damsel in distress, at the mercy of others, awaiting our rescue.

We're sold ideals - often ones we didn't choose for ourselves. We're enmeshed in an overculture holding that the primary purpose of a woman is to be decoration: we are to be looked at first, and we experience no shortage of tips and tricks to help improve our appearances. Comments on our bodies are often the loudest of all, proclaiming that if we aren't up to the standard, nothing else matters.

We look for respite in creams, in exercise programs, in diets...only to discover that these often provide little relief. Perhaps because these are attempts to solve an issue we never agreed was a problem in the first place.

You Deserve to Feel Powerful in Your Body.

You Deserve to Feel Powerful in Your Body.

Stephanie Ondrusek
mindset, general BAMFery

When we're sold an ideal based in the physical, we're never enough. We can always find a lump, a stretch mark, a muscle that's too big or too small (as the case may be), a too-long nose, or a rough patch of skin. We spend hours in the mirror or glancing at car windows on a walk, examining our angles and how our clothes lie on our bodies and, if a bra strap is pinching or a shirt isn't skimming lightly over a belly, we measure it against how we've eaten recently. Thoughts of failure come rushing in, and we rush out to buy into the next solution.

We deserve so much more.