Why Don't We Have Both? (You Can Be Exactly as Soft and as Strong as You Decide to Be.)

Toughness.

What does it look like to be tough?

How do we balance this with our softness?

Because you, my friend, are both, to whichever degrees you desire.

It can be confusing to be told what you are and what you aren’t,. We’re nowhere near a dearth of requests to be at once quiet and exuberant, acquiescent and ambitious, soft and strong.

Why do we have to choose?

We’re allowed to hold an opinion and seek more information. We’re permitted to bury ourselves in books and scale mountains. We can be found making sandwiches in the kitchen and pumping iron in the gym.

Some would argue that toughness isn’t found in traditionally feminine spaces. I would counter that that’s exactly where it’s forged: in the fires of discovery. In the spaces where we get quiet and are introduced to ourselves, learning who we truly are despite competing messages telling us who to be.
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We can be both soft and strong. We can be #grittyAF, molding the strong woman inside as she comes out in layers, getting beaten back by the lessons on the path but showing up time and again.

When she steps through the ring of fire, brushes the ash off her shoulders but leaves the smudges on her face, and stakes her claim in the world is when the woman has won.

You can display exactly as much toughness as you like.

You can be exactly as soft and as strong as you decide to be.

xoxo,
Steph