All tagged feminism

Does It Feel Like, "Loving Your Body," Is Only For Other People?

Does It Feel Like, "Loving Your Body," Is Only For Other People?

Stephanie Ondrusek
body image, coaching, feminism, FAQs + hacks, mindset

I know many people who wake up every morning, and right before they look in the mirror to greet themselves for the day, they feel pure terror. Dread. Fear. We steel ourselves up to brace for the, "flaws," someone else has told us will be there, and we wonder how, "bad," they look that day, and the chorus starts:

"Ugh, gross."
"I can't wear that. Do I have any clean, flowy tops?"
"I'm giving a presentation today; will this hold across my chest?"
"I shouldn't have eaten ____ last night. I never get this right."

We've discussed it before, but it bears repeating: the language you're using has a measurable impact on your perspective.

Many clients come to me unhappy with their bodies, desperately hoping that the program I present will hold all the secrets to body change, and, as a result, happiness. They're disappointed to find out that it doesn't always work that way, and, in fact, countless repeated incidents of this led me to examine my coaching philosophy, such that I no longer coach with a focus on intentional fat loss.

Liking our bodies (and ourselves) is an inside job, one that can't be completed in an hour a day at the gym and a salad every night for dinner. It's a practice, and it often feels unreachable: how many times have you asked yourself, "how do I go from hating everything about my body to loving it? LOVING it?"

It seems a million miles away for a lot of us. It did for me.

How Do You Feel Powerful?

How Do You Feel Powerful?

Stephanie Ondrusek
mindset, general BAMFery, feminism

POWER: what does it mean to you? Where is it found?

Does it hide from you, running to the dingy corner as soon as you enter the room and turn on the light? Or does it display itself proudly, waving its flag in your life as you march like General Sherman on his way to the sea, asserting your presence and leaving flames in your wake?

As womxn in a patriarchal world, there is no shortage of places we're told we can't be. There is no dearth of reminders of our status, supposedly submissive. In the board room, in the bedroom, in the gym, in the damn left-hand lane—we're underrepresented, told we don't belong, deemed, "too emotional," to handle it.

POWER: it isn't something supposedly meant for us.

Which is why I'd like to ask you where you find it for yourself.

That Time I Thought, "It HAS to be Valentine's Day by now..."

That Time I Thought, "It HAS to be Valentine's Day by now..."

Stephanie Ondrusek
feminism, mindset

If you're new to the fitness scene, welcome! The endeavor to begin a new habit can sometimes be a rocky one fraught with hiccups and false starts, making January a frustrating month for many.

If you find yourself there, hair in your hands and wondering why you even started again, know that you're not alone, and anything that hasn't gone according to plan is not a signal of failure, but a call to listen to your body and soul more deeply, asking questions to further refine your goals. What's worked so far? What hasn't? How has it felt? What's made it easy? How can you get more of that?

If you're a gym veteran, you may have had to make some space on your favorite Stairmaster or in the squat rack with the best mirror, which can also make January feel like a long month. If you've felt a bit frustrated, know that you're not alone either, and consider that anyone with the desire to share a space with you or with the courage to ask you a question is likely overcoming some uncertainty, and they'll find their rhythm soon enough (and you were new once, too).

How Do You Define Yourself?

How Do You Define Yourself?

Stephanie Ondrusek
body image, feminism

We’re told, at every turn, how we must define ourselves.

We all know the narrative of the overculture: womxn are supposed to be small, demure, delicate. We're constantly in pursuit of shrinking and forever deferring to someone – anyone – with more authority.

Many of us hold this societal ideal in the lofty turrets of our minds for a lifetime: we remain locked away like Rapunzel, hoping someone will climb the tower and ask us if that ideal is, in fact, who we are or what we want. In the meantime, we accept it and work tirelessly to fit into that mold.

Has it ever occurred to you that you can ask yourself?

On Body Image

On Body Image

Stephanie Ondrusek
feminism, body image

Body image issues are complex, and their roots run deep.

Societally, all women are told we are not enough, on some level, but this is not true to the same degree for all of us.

No one issue is any more valid than another—there is space to process for all of us—but it would be shortsighted to fail to acknowledge that some issues are more costly than others, literally and figuratively.

Step Off the Diet Rollercoaster.

Step Off the Diet Rollercoaster.

Stephanie Ondrusek
coaching, feminism

The moment we let advertising & its victims tell us what’s best for us is the watershed moment for many; what follows is a trickling stream – and eventual downpour – of shame. We're told that certain foods are bad, or that lifting heavy makes us bulky & that we shouldn’t want to “look like a man."

Hear me clearly: NO ONE knows what’s right for you better than you do.