All in general BAMFery

I’d love to share with you an exercise I do at the beginning of every year. Writing these things down and remembering that any change starts from a place of love, inspiration, and excitement (rather than hate, blame, and dread of “having” to change this thing we hate…hey man, we’ve all been there and seen how well *that* worked, ::coughcough:: not at all) helps us remember why we got started in the first place. Even though we’re 10 days in, if you haven’t done so already, sit down, write these questions on a piece of paper, set a timer for 15m, and free write/type your answers to find your magic:

1.       What do I do well? What, in particular, went well in [2016]?

2.       Where do I have room for improvement? What do I want more of in my life (feelings or things)?

3.       Why are these improvements important to me? What will I feel or do better by accomplishing this? How will it affect my daily life and routine?

4.       What has been standing in my way of getting this done before now? Why is now different?

5.       What am I willing to give up to achieve this goal? What am I unwilling to sacrifice?

6.       How can I capitalize on my strengths (#1) to achieve the [peace/magic/stability/joy…answer from #3] and make 2017 the year of actual, sustainable change?

Survive the Holidays: Set Some Boundaries; Choose to Love (always).

It’s the week before Christmas, and all through the house, not a creature was stirring…except whoever’s doing the cooking (and any last-minute packers, like me.).

Visiting friends and family for the holidays can be a stressful affair for many. I wanted to write about love and boundaries: topics that will be helpful to keep in mind during the all-but-inevitable holiday conflict (hey, when a bunch of people who’ve known each other all their lives get together, some buttons are bound to get pushed).

So, step one in smoother holidays: choose to love. ALWAYS. Even when you get called crazy. Or when your aunt says that super-offensive thing that has you thinking, “HOW ARE WE EVEN RELATED??” Or when your dad burns the pie. Or whatever else really grinds your gears. Choose to give the benefit of the doubt. Choose to remain unoffended. Choose to still think of that person as a flawed, unique, good-hearted individual. Choose to love.

Struggles + Strengths are Two Sides of the Same Coin.

Examining our struggles in light of our talents, dreams, values, hopes, and capacities forces us to consider our positive qualities and where overcoming the struggle is possible. We aren’t dismissing the struggle, but reminding ourselves who’s boss (spoiler: it’s you.).

Remember a couple weeks ago when we examined our core values? If growth and courage are two of them (I find they are, most of the time…and they certainly are in fitness and nutrition goals- that’s sort of the point once we get beyond vanity, isn’t it? ;) ), it’s important to cultivate this culture of learning – trying, failing, examining what worked and what didn’t, rework the plan, and coming back stronger. If failure isn’t an option, neither is growth.

On perfectionism and why it's bullshit.

Perfectionism is a shield. It’s a defense move: the belief that if we do things perfectly and look physically perfect while doing it, we will avoid judgment, shame, and/or blame. It’s not about our internal motivation at all. Perfectionism is ALL about other people and trying to earn their approval; it’s correlated with depression, anxiety, and addiction; and, perhaps most frustratingly, it impedes our achievement, because it throws the fear of failure/meeting *OTHER PEOPLE’S* expectations (rather than our own) in our faces, thereby keeping us out of the arena of really trying.

A self-worth manifesto (in which food is JUST EFFING FOOD).

Most of us want to engage in our lives from a place of worthiness. When we realize that no matter what choices we make – pizza, salad, lifting, walking, having that tough conversation with our boss or partner, avoiding it for another day, etc. – no matter what gets done or what gets left undone, we are still enough, our perspective on our choices changes.

Getting to that point requires us to show up and let ourselves be seen. Which can be terrifying, especially if we are used to putting up a shield (which manifests in various forms, but, for me, perfectionism is my go-to…more on that soon :) ). Cultivating a sense of worth – remembering that it is our birthright – changes everything about our approach to food, exercise, work, and relationships: it has the power to set us free.


Taking the leap to become a stronger, more resilient version of you is worth the courage it takes to get there EVERY TIME.

We are strong and worthy. Our goals should always be plans to improve and upgrade ourselves into elevation, not fix what’s “wrong” with what we see.
That framing makes all the difference in the world between yo-yo dieting and effortlessly eating to serve your goals, and between a 21-day “banish xyz flaw” plan and training to be more mobile, energetic, and powerful.

Strength in Showing Up.

There is strength in fully showing up.

What I mean by that is, enter your relationships being fully, honestly, unabashedly YOU- boundaries, goals, struggles, and all. It certainly can be scary, especially if you’ve never done it before or if your closest friends don’t have the same goals as you. But creating space to express that vulnerability is your job; how others react to it is theirs to decide.

I believe that we are creation of the Creator, and more than a workout solution on a piece of paper; we should, therefore, move and eat and love ourselves as such. This includes making choices in service to our higher selves – nutritionally, physically, and emotionally. We have more talent and power than we are taught to realize, particularly as women. We are all able to move past our stories into a place of healing and strength.